Product of the year - Software Comedy Skit

Product of the Year....

Skit screen play

Story: Santhosh Kumar

Screen play: Santhosh Kumar, Ishan Vasishta, Shivam Gupta, Aditya Singh

Characters: 

Client : Mr. Khurana old guy with big tummy. Behind his beautiful sec:

Sales Manager: Rocket Singh: Young guy, very talkative

Secretary: Beauty conscious young lady

PM: Beautiful lady. Always in fight with dev and QA

QA: Bihari, Weak in English. planning to go on date with PM

Dev: South Indian, crazy about food, wears Lungi whenever possible

Waiter: 

Auto Driver: Greedy

Florist : Humorous

Dancer: Dev/AutoDriver/Florist can play this role if needed 

SCENE 1

Rock S : Abhi Tak nahi aaya saala . 10 baje ka tym diya tha 11 baj gaye hain.

Client Enters >>>

Rock S : Hello Sir. I am Rocket Singh from Jugad-In Mobile.

Khurana (Client) : Oi tu he hai phataka singh!! , oi bejja bejja . Dekh khurrana ka tym ni kharab karna.

Khurana sits and starts scratching his tummy

Sm: Sir we have very good products. I will suggest you to go for Emraan haashmi Mika tips....

<Secretary Enters and interrupts>

Sec : Gooood Morning khurana, . Bandh kar khujaana...

<music plays>

Sorry Khuranna, I got a bit late..... because of the stuuuu-pid cab driver.he reached my home on time...and I was still applying my makeup. you know it takes time. the idiot left without even waiting for an hour.

Khur : Oi chod aaya tenu!! Inni himmat ho ho gayi. Kal he nikal dete hain. Oi kaali ho gayi dhoop mai, thoda makeup shakeup kar le sweety.

Khur : Oi ye pategi teri Hashmi tip se ..

Rock S : Oi sir pategi ji ..ekdum pategi.

Sec <interrupts>:: Hey you Rocket Singh, why don’t you suggest a product which can put some brains in that stupid driver’s head.

ROck S : No problem sweety we have driver tips for that.

Sec (Shouting): “Sweety ?? Who gave you permission to call me sweety?”

SM: ”Oh I am sorry madam I thought your name is sweety”

Sec: “My name is Cutie Kaur. Call me Cutie”

Khur : Oi phatke aise tucche products se ni hoga. Koi vadiya product bana jo jisse bande nu pata lag jaye ki ki karna hai.

SM : Sir ji bana denge......samjo ban he gaya.

Khur : OI tu aisa kar, kal dede , ye sweety roz roz late ho jaati hai.

SM : Oi sirji kal ..sir kal sir kal kaisa hoga sir. 10 din to lag he jaayenge sir.

Khur : Oi 10 din !! na oi na .. 5 din lele chal isse jayada nai.

SM : Chal sir ji aapki nai meri nai …. saat din do aur ban gaya samjo.

Khur : Chal done.

SM calls someone: We need to create a product urgently, lets call a meeting tomorrow.

Scene 2: (Product meeting Man, QA , DEV , SM)

SM : Look Team we have to deliver a product, i.e situation based tips. like while driving we have to send driving tips n while cooking cooking tips.

QA : Ok I got it, but what if the person is So raha hai.

Product : U don’t have to send any alert while sleeping U Idiot.

Dev : Is this gonna be a pull based service. (pulls his lungi up)

Product M : No the system has to be intelligent enough to understand the situation of the user.

Dev : Paagal ho gaye ho kyaa, framework support bhi karta hai ye.????

Product : Kyaa hamra framework kuch bhi support karta hai.

SM : And we have got only 3 days of time.

Dev: teen din !!! What the Fish. Ye change to mai 3 hafte mai nahi kar sakta...

QA: mai test kab karoonga.

SM : Listen everyone UAt has been scheduled. Mujhe ye product 3 din mein chahiye

Dev QA frustrated.....

Scene End

Narration

Do deen beete kuch product bana aur kuch bigda . Aur ab laga tester ke haath::

SCENE 3: Developer does UT -  Eating Habit Tips 

Developer name is Santhosh

<Tester sitting trying to eat recieves call>

SM: Development ka status kay hai

DEv: Good morning sir. do din se sirf coding kar raha hai. Khana peena bhi nahi. Sirf development. ?

SM: Coding kon kar raha hai.

DEV: No sir I am only coding. I have finished it. Let me start testing

SM: Oh great. I am going to fire you, if th product doesn’t work properly.

DEv: Fire ??? Oh no no I will fix all bugs today itself let me start testing....

SM: ok all the best

Dev: thank you....

DEv:”let me subscribe to my product fine.....Done. ok let me have some food. too hungy....”

::tries to eat a something::

Beep Beep:: Santhosh STOP!! Have u brushed properly in the morning.

---> Garggle and then starts

Dev: Hey my product is working. I am awesome.....

:: again tries to eat something ::

Beep Beep :: Santhosh Always Brush twice a day!!

---> Garggle again

Dev :: Chalo now lets eat pizza.

::tries to eat pizza ::

Beep Beep: Santhosh......Very High Calorie Food, your cholestrol level is already too high!!

Dev:: OK let me have some Spicy Biryani.

Beep Beep:: Santosh, Dont you dare eat this, it can cause fire in your LUNGI

Dev: Lungi .... Fire????

Jumps from the seat and checks his lungi

Dev: Dara diya system ne....

Dev : Ok sandwich is healthy food, let me try that

:: tries to eat Sandwich ::

Beep Beep: Santhosh...Rotten vegetables are used in preparation of this sandwich do not eat.

<Smell it and keep it back>

Tester: It looks ok.

Beep Beep: No its not ok!!

:: tries to drink coffee ::

Beep Beep: Santhosh....Caffine is injurious to health. Also your mother did’nt want you to have too much coffee.

Dev: Bull shit 

hits hard on the table

:: tries to go for mineral water then stops::

Beep Beep :: Santhosh.....Go ahead have it, its good for health.

tester: what a stupid product. let the tester test now. Uski Lagegi

SCENE 4 Dating-----

Beep Beep : Wake up!

Beep Beep: WAKE UP Duffer ! Today you have a date!

Scene will be like funky clothing and

1st Msg: Don't bathe in ur dabba deo, have a nice shower and use a perfume.!!!!! And wear a nice plain suit.

Scene waiting for bus-

After buying flowers

2nd Msg: Hey cheepo, Take a bike or call a cab.

“Oye Hotel Pride chalega? “

3rd - Msg: Buy a bunch of mariegold's for her, it's her fav.

Scene - In the Restaurant- Waiting for her.

Scence - She arrives

5th Msg - Don't go for a hand shake, u r not 13 any more. wo american wali greeting.

6th Msg - pull up a chair for her.

Scene - Sitting with her

Tester - These flowers are for you.

Girl - Oh merrygold, thts my fav.

7th Msg - Order one of the finest wine Le Van De Merde.

Tester - Arre waiter, lemon the mirinda rakhat ho ka bhaiya???

Waiter - Excuse me Sir, Kya?

tester - lemon the mirinda

Waiter - no sir we do not keep mirinda

tester - are mirinda nahi lemon de mirinda

Waiter - no lemon mirinda also sir

Tester - he will show the msg.

Waiter - Sure Sir, Two glasses of Le Van De Merde at ur table

Girl - Wow, thts my fav wine. Hw cm u know it.

Report - Check.

8th Msg - Ask her, Howz her work.

Tester - hos work?

Girl - My Work....!!!!

Tester - noding his head.

Girl - Work is fine.

Boy: Do u like to listen to songs?

Girl: Yes

8th Msg - Ask DJ to play Kanwa mein shobe baali.

Tester - Asks DJ to Play

Girl: Bhojpuri?!?!

Tester: Manoj tiwary ka hain. Bahut accha hain!! !

Girl - Starts making faces.

10th Msg - *some text missing* ask her abt her age.

Tester - Whooo old r u?

Girl - Who?

Tester - tohar age ka ba?

Girl - (slapps the tester) - Badtameez. Ladki ko impress bhi nahi karne aata aur bada aaye date pe huhh..!!! Ladkiyon ke age nahi puchthe

11th Msg - *Dont ask her age.

Tester: SANTHOSH !!!!

SCENE5

------------

One part of the stage : C and Sec

Other part of the stage: SM, PM, QA and DEv

SM calls C on phone: Khurana sir,,, ap UAT kar raho ho na?

C: “Ha ha sweety bhi mere naalh hai,, Hum dono mike kara raha hai …. UAT ”

SM: “aap Subscribe kar ke ek bar chek karo”

C: “Ha ha kar rahe hai … UAT”

SM and Team tensed: “Santhosh and Chimpu I will fire all of you if UAT fails”

Clients call to SM: “Arey what a wonderful product. I got a messge You and sweety make a good couple and you can go for dinner tonight. And sweety has agreed for that. Mera life ban jayega. kyaa product of the year banaya hai...”

Everyboy shouts YES...Juggad on mobile rock..

All dances for oppa gannam style ..... Song.....End